I am convinced that I will quite possibly die if I ever leave the house without the following things.
Die.
Irrational.
I can't control it. I can't handle it if any of them are missing.
I wish that I was kidding.
I so wish that I was.
If I am going out for five minutes, five hours, or five days, these are sure to be with me.
My desert island luxuries, if you will.
Be warned. Much unnecessary drama to follow. I am not a dramatic person. That is unless I am without one of my non-negotiables. Then drama. Epic loads of drama ensues.
Burts Bees chapstick.
Not one. Not two. Ideally three. Because you never know if one or two will suddenly get lost. Because if that happens... I will die.
Sunglasses. If the sun is out, they are on my face. If it is one minute from sunset, they are on my face. If it is raining, chances are, they are on my face. I am pretty sure the sole reason that I would never, ever try out for Survivor is not the weather, the bugs, the starving, the backstabbing. No, the reason is the contestants aren't allowed to wear sunglasses. I would die.
Ponytail holders. Goody. Brown. Big. Ouchless. Three minimum. (See Burt's Bee's above.) What if I need to put my hair up? That is a serious problem. Without them. I will die.
A necklace. Without one I sort of can't breathe. But not a bracelet or ring. If I am wearing a bracelet or ring I sort of can't breathe. Did I mention that I am a freakshow? I cannot go more than a few minutes a day without a necklace on. I can't go more than a few minutes a day with a bracelet on. Not normal. My current fave is from Stinky Toes Designs. Amy is raising money to help defray their adoption expenses. I love the story and meaning behind her designs and I love helping even a little to bring her children home from Africa.
My point and shoot. Because you never, ever know when you are going to see something crazy that you need to take a picture of. Like for instance a lady who is having a panic attack because her chapstick is at home. Not like that has ever, ever happened to me. Today. Freakshow.
I keep all of them, my sanity, my security, in my scissor zippy from The Pleated Poppy. If only Lindsey knew how she saved me from peril and death every single day. I owe her and this zippy my life.
i know just what you mean. all too many times i've run out of the house only to realize that i don't have my rosebud salve in my bag and then it ends up being the ONLY thing i can think of. i end up forgetting what groceries to buy it's so bad. i think i need a zippy case to keep it in. it would make it so much easier to know i have it with me.
ReplyDeletelove those necklaces! i'm a little in love with the map one. i'm pretty sure i need it. like, now.
YOU kill me EVERYDAY.....thank you for always making me smile!
ReplyDeletep.s. I want to be in your club even though you are digi!
This is hilarious because it's so true. Here are my non-negotiables:
ReplyDeleteChapstick brand chapstick.
Hair band {always around my wrist & ugly but I don't care}
stud earrings. if I forget to put them in, I'll die.
CELLPHONE. OMG. I don't have to even explain.
Love the list.
If those needs are irrational, then I don't want to be rational!
ReplyDeleteI have 7 lip balms in my purse and sunglasses are absolutely a necessity (migraines if I don't wear them). My hair is too short for a pony, but I keep a minimum of 2-3 clips in my bag! The only thing I would add is my phone - can't go ANYWHERE without it!
I am the exact same way about my Burt's Bees and my sunglasses. I would be lost without my sunglasses. Literally, because without them I am blind, and I would forced to wander around, confused and disoriented. And let's not even get started on how much I start to panic if I don't have a chapstick within arms reach. Lipstick? Hardly ever wear it. Chapstick, specifically Burt's Bees? Strategically placed around my house so I never have to worry about dry lips.
ReplyDeleteHi! Just wanted to say I love you blog. I found you through Drew at DrewB Photography. I've been reading your blog for a while- but thought I should drop a comment. Your girls are adorable. Oh- also- I made the salted caramel cupcakes you posted for my husband for Fathers Day...he LOVED them- and so did my boys. Thanks for the awesome recipe.
ReplyDeleteKevyn
you're funny.
ReplyDeletei'm the same with Goody ouchless hair ties. But mine are rainbow colors and always one or two around my wrist, hanging from the drive shift of my car, and stuffed in pockets and drawers all over the house!
do you even have a rational mind?
i don't think i do.
I am that way with my sunglasses too...I absolutely cannot see without them! :)
ReplyDeleteLove... I just finished making three zip clutches so I can organzie and comparmentalize ALL of my MUST HAVES...
ReplyDeleteToo funny! I am with you when it comes to sunglasses, ponytail holders, and camera.
ReplyDeleteI have been known to wear sunglasses at night to keep my hair out of my face. You can get away with it when you live in florida.
I have also been known to have a rubber band around my wrist in some important photos aka. wedding. Yay for Photoshop!!
This MADE my day! So funny!
ReplyDeleteI am stealing this post idea. Did you want me to ask for permission? Cause I didn't. And I think I'm more of a freakshow...three of one thing? How about 3 pairs of sunglasses? Or three camera batteries for my itty bitty POS P&S. Yeah, I need a post like this.
ReplyDeletexo
I can totally relate! I agree with everything on your list, but I unfortunatly have to add my cell phone to the list. Sad but true! I tried your cheesy artichoke dip and it was yummo! Added a link to my blog too ;)
ReplyDeleteI can't tell you how hard I am laughing right now. Not because I think you are irrational, but because I feel the same way! My bag always has chapstick, hair elastic (at least until I chopped all my hair off), lotion, gum (I have this fear of offending someone with stinky breath), and my phone (not as much for the actual phone as the camera function. My kids lost my point and shoot!)
ReplyDeleteI LOVE the stinky toes necklaces...GOTTA order one !
ReplyDeleteI also need a zippy case...REALLy need it ! hummm...
Burts bees ..who in there right mind can live w/o it ?? Maybe with less than 3...;0)
hugs! your posts make me happy !
Did you know that Target (& probably other places) sell a "value pack" of Burts? It's a two pack for $5-something. Cheaper than buying them singly. I'm just waiting for Costco to sell them in a SERIOUS value pack!! God Bless, BURT and his BEES!
ReplyDeleteyou forgot your iphone.
ReplyDeleteyou know, for texting.
if you're into that kind of thing.
you forgot your iphone.
ReplyDeleteyou know, for texting.
if you're into that kind of thing.
That is HILARIOUS! I am the SAME way about sunglasses! BUT I have 2 pair...1 for semi-sunny shade days and another for the real sunny days and I always have them on.
ReplyDeleteYou should stop using the burts bees chapstick. There is a reason you can't go without it - it dries out your lips so you have to use more. They feel fine once you've put it on but once its on for a while it sucks all the moisture out of your lips and then you feel the need to reapply. I'm not kidding. I only realized it after I stopped using it.
ReplyDeleteI totally understand the hair elastic obsession though! I also usually have a bunch of AA batteries some dead some good in my bag at all times for my crappy camera.
I am laughing or crying with you!! I have a few of those things... and I too have numbers... I must have two of those, three of those...etc.. hand lotion for instance... 2 minimum!! I have to have it in my purse!! I would die without it!! I need to work on the camera...when I don't have it ... without fail... something funny or fantastic is found!! and plain chap stick or Burts... I love both... one of each must be with me at all times! Love your little zippy! too cute! I am addicted to zippy bags like that... I keep all kinds of fun things in them.. first aid kits... tooth fairy gold/dust... hair things... LOTION!! it is a sickness... I have it too! lol! =)
ReplyDeleteHA!! Love this post...I too have not one but two zippered pouches from the infamous Lindsey! one for my obsession w/ Bath & Body Works lip glosses and Burts bees. The second for my kids junk..goldfish, cars, wipes..
ReplyDeleteAmen to the Goody hair bands sister! I actually have a goody hair brush that I have had since I was born that I seriously went into a mild depression about during a two week stretch when it went missing and I thought it was gone forever. There will never be a brush that functions better than this one. Drama purse? I raise you one hairbrush :)
ReplyDeletelol! That is awesome!
ReplyDeleteAmazing. Absolutely amazing. Not only are you as crazy as me, but you can admit it! :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for the smiles!
Julie, you make me feel more normal. I'd have to add my swiss army pocket knife. If you buy one and put it on your keychain, you will realize that you have a need for one of the tools on that thing every single day. No kidding.
ReplyDeleteyou are too funny! :) smiles, gina
ReplyDeleteOh, you are precious. :) In the craziest way possible!
ReplyDeleteOh my word...too funny!!! Right there with you on the lip balm (although mine is this crazy German kind with a little pink sheen to it), sunglasses and necklace (although watch & ring go with that for me). Used to be the same way with the ponytail holders too (one on wrist, one in small jean pocket) but I cut my hair last year so not needed anymore. Like to have a camera but NEED to have my iphone.
ReplyDeleteAll I have to say is, no wonder I like your blog so much!
I'm with you on the Burt's Bee's. There is one in every room of our house :)
ReplyDeletegirl you are too funny! I think I should nick name you "scout" because you must be always prepared! I really understand the hair, and burt's bee, and of course the camera since you blog -but the necklace cracked me up!!! But my friend who owns a jewelry store (she must be an expert!) always says "no outfit is complete without a necklace" so Scout you must Rock your outfit every day!
ReplyDeleteI totally get this! I am due in about 3 weeks with our 2nd child and I am obsessed with not forgetting my Burt's Bees "chapstick" when we go to the hospital! There's one in the new diaper bag, one in my purse, one in my toiletries kit, one in the car..... It certainly is a NEED! :)
ReplyDeleteHA HA HA cracking me up! Water bottle and iPhone. You will not find me without them, even in the house.
ReplyDeleteyep. can't leave the house without a necklace. (I even keep an extra necklace in my car - just in case, for whatever rare reason, I step out of the house without one already on.)
ReplyDeleteOh, I hear you. Especially about the chapstick. Except on my "die without" list, dental floss may be number one. I may or may not have left a party early once because I couldn't get something out of my teeth with my tongue.
ReplyDeleteI'm with you on all of those, *especially* on the ponytail holders. A few months ago we were at Nordstrom...my hair was back (like it always is) and my ponytail holder broke while in my hair!! All of my hair came out and looked all frump-a-dump and I searched my purse and diaper bag for another ponytail holder and there weren't any. TEARS! I seriously started crying.
ReplyDelete{So, it was just a few days after G was born and I was extra hormonal, but so what} ;)
It could be worse....I don't have an example of how, but I assume it could be worse. And I'm like you with a necklace. If I don't have one on, I grab at my neck about every 45 seconds. It's not pretty. And my wedding ring. I FREAK OUT every time I take it off. Which isn't often. But when I'm making pizza dough or bread I have to take it off so I don't spend hours cleaning it with a toothpick to get all the dough out. But as soon as I'm done, I put it back on and then "double check" for the next six hours that it's on.
ReplyDeleteI totally understand!! You're list is almost EXACTLY my list! My chapstick though is this stuff from the dermatologists office that they give me for FREE when I come in to buy my makeup. If I get a nice girl, she gives it to me in major bulk. It makes my lips feel amazing and has this wonderful vanilla flavor... mmmmm. My boyfriend mocks the 3 tubes that I carry. AND the tubes that are scattered all throughout my house. He doesn't get it haha He just has learned to smile and say whatever you want. Love it!
ReplyDeleteThis post made me laugh! Because I totally agree about the first three on the list. I will drive back to my house to get them if I have to!
ReplyDelete